My husband makes me laugh!
Dear Mr. President,
I am thankful that you care so much about me, an American taxpayer. After hearing you speak time and again about your compassion for us small people and listening to the solutions you propose for our economic crisis, it seems logical for me, an American taxpayer, to let you know about my day.
This morning I got a call from Chrysler. Well, they were upset over something to do with the lease on my 300 SRT8. The guy went on and on. He had not heard you were running that company now but I assured him you were bringing change we can believe in… you were probably just tied up over at GM. I tried to explain to them how I was now a shareholder but they didn’t seem to understand. Would you please have someone in your administration clear this up? Maybe you could have Secretary Gates call them? I like him… great man… so pleased you're CONTINUING his war strategy... that's change we can believe in.
It’s been busy. The IRS sent me a very hateful letter today. I tried to call and speak to someone but only computers were available. Maybe they are confused by all the “automatic” options they now have to process from small business owners like me. You put in place some serious changes… changes we can believe in. Anyhow, I wrote them a letter back, with copy to you, and explained everything. No, me either… I think they were assuming that policies for your Cabinet were exclusive. I cleared it up and let them know the precedent was set by your Cabinet… obviously paying taxes is optional (just so long as not paying is an honest mistake).
Well, by midday American Express called. They really like me. I know you don’t like to talk about the past 8 years, but they sure made a lot of money from me. You wouldn’t believe the different cards they gave me… gold, green, blue, black, plum, clear… great stuff! Anyhow, they were calling because they are concerned. Apparently keeping my businesses a float on their cards over the past few months has created alarm. Did you know they say I have spent more money than I have? I know. It took awhile but I finally got through to them. The lady I was speaking with was fortunately a BIG fan of yours. Once she understood you had spent more money (you, me, us, the Country doesn’t have) in just “74 days” than that of all our prior President’s combined, she understood my logic. Hey, it is all in the name bringing change we can believe in. Her supervisor wasn’t as friendly and may or may not be your fan; anyhow, I told them to give you a call. Do you need the number?
Gosh, I hope your day is going good. I see you are over in France
picking up tips on socialism. Don’t underestimate yourself! You are
killing capitalism faster than you think. Hang in there. Maybe you
should “preach” at them… I hear you’re a new Messiah.
One other thing… I know your team probably keeps you well informed but
you better be on top of Apple and Google. I know you like the iPod
(what music did you have loaded for the Queen?), but I’m worried Steve
Jobs is making way too much money. Also, check out those Google guys.
They have their own jumbo jet. They are thinking about buying Twitter
for $1 Billion!!! Whilst both companies are led by true innovators and
are setting benchmarks for technology in the world, you might need to
cap their earnings. Success like this is dangerous to the change we can
believe in.
Seeking change I can believe in,
jason
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